Saturday, August 8, 2009

To Hollywood: BYO-TP!

Just a few weeks ago, Hollywood decided to pack their bags and journey to the place where they seem to feel the most at home: Good Ole Commie Cuba (Click to See Full Story). Finally, they have a President that would fulfill their deepest desires and allow them free travel to that mini-version of the former U.S.S.R. Time was running out and all those lefties of Hollywood were getting desperate to see their hero, Fidel, before he was no longer on this earth. Obama was a complete answer to their little marxist prayers.

Cuba is the absolute home of socialism and communism in the Northern Hemisphere of these Americas. No self-respecting Hollywood leftist would be worth his or her salt if they hadn't said they visited Cuba at least once in their lifetimes. It would be sure to be a big hit at all those Hollywood cocktail parties and social events. God knows that any A-lister's trip to Cuba would trump any other small talk at a party about someone's charity work or their so-passe testimony before the Democrats in Congress. For Hollywood, a visit to Cuba is almost as paramount to them as a Muslim having visited Mecca at least once in their lifetime.

Well, I think they'd better pack an extra bag and just completely fill it with toilet paper! Besides the lack of cars, cell phones, electricity, and all the other things that Hollywood can't seem to do without; Cuba now has a toilet paper shortage (Click to See Full Story). Isn't communism/socialism great! You can get all the free health care you want but you can't wipe your own you-know-what!

So, where's Michael Moore now? He never seems to be around when he can't just give complete and glowing praise to his favorite little island in the sun: Fidel's Disneyland of the Caribbean.

Actually, Cuba might not be too happy to see Michael Moore, again. At least until the T.P. shortage is over. That chub would probably run the whole country of Cuba out of T.P. in a single day! In the midst of our public health care debate: Moore seems to think that Cuba is the epitome of health care because it's free! That's because, in Cuba, health care just grows on trees! He even took 9/11 victims to Cuba to get their health care so he could make props of them for another one of his anti-American movies called 'Sicko'. While health care might be free, toilet paper just might warrant a virtual king's ransom.

I guess if the Democrats get their way, America won't just be making a choice between paper and plastic. We'll have to add the choice of either free health care or toilet paper! It will be another one of the "life choices" that we'll all have to make on our path to socialism. One of those sacrifices and tough choices that Obama seemed to have talked about in his campaign.

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